We’ve all heard about taking personal responsibility for our own lives. Based on a recent wonderful learning experience, I’d like to reframe that if I may. What do you think makes a bigger impact: personal responsibility or personal investment?
The self-help movement has championed personal responsibility and to an extent, this is very good. To an extent.
Each one of us should take responsibility for every single action, thought, word and deed. Every single day.
But that same self help movement has turned taking charge of a messy life into a weapon to mercilessly beat ourselves up with when life goes sideways.
Truthfully? I’m done with being a big ‘ol punching bag for the self help industry.
So, when I talk about responsibility vs. investment, it’s not to abdicate my role in my own life. Not at all. Quite the opposite.
Responsibility Vs. Investment
I attended a workshop recently where I learned how to really tap into my soul and listen. It was a 8 hour workshop and I learned so much about being true to myself, understanding my inner judge/critic (gawd is she ever cruel!) and having a theme for my year instead of simply setting goals.
It’s a way for me to begin a new year differently than I have in the past. If I keep doing the same thing over and over again, I’m going to get the same result – which is insane! And I want different results.
One thing early in the workshop that made me snap to attention – especially when talking about well-being – is the difference between personal responsibility and personal investment.
Every self help book out there harps on taking personal responsibility: always being positive; fixing every perceived shortcoming, setting stellar goals and reaching them, have the perfect attitude every single moment…yada…yada…yada…
One of the ways we get off track with resolutions and goals is that we’re so focused on “fixing” (aka personal responsibility), that we forget our goals may take time. One thing I share with my aromatherapy clients is that the blend they purchase will not magically make their concern go away – poof – overnight.
You didn’t get to this point overnight and you won’t magically heal anything overnight – or make it go away. So instead of beating yourself up with the personal responsibility stick, think about it this way:
Every worthwhile investment takes time to bear fruit.
What’s the difference?
You’re (hopefully) investing in your future by saving for your retirement. Right? So why not use that same investment strategy when it comes to your education, your job, your home and your health?
I see it this way: taking personal responsibility, while commendable in theory, falls miserably short in reality.
For instance, let’s say you begin a journey to change a habit or create a new habit because of a resolution you made on December 31st. Science tells us that resolution will last about 18 – 23 days and then…crickets…nothing.
You fall right back into old habits and patterns and feel like a failure – yes, I’ve been there.
Why do you fail so fast?
Because there’s no real investment.
But if you go at it from a different mindset, there’s much less chance of failing and feeling miserable. How about starting out with a better frame of mind by exploring a theme for the coming year and investing in you?
The theme you choose is your investment in yourself and tends to be far less rigid and stressful. You want to get into better physical shape? So, your theme is health and all the things you do to stay healthy fall under that theme. That can include eating well, exercising and self-care.
So now you’re invested in your health over the long haul without jumping off the deep end that ensures you’re drowning in less than a month. And the subset – or bullet points – of your theme are fluid and can change as they need to.
A big part of self-care is knowing and believing that you are worthy of investment. (Psst…in case no one’s told you – you ARE worthy of investing in yourself!)
We’re coming up on the third week of January which is real close to do-or-die time for all those resolutions. How about investing in your whole well-being this year?
Need a little boost to begin your investment?
Investing In Me Blend
- 4 drops Black Pepper (Piper nigrum)
- 4 drops Bergamot (Citrus bergamia)
- 2 drops Sandalwood (Santalum album)
- 2 drops Rose Geranium (Rosa x damascena/pelargonium x asperum)
- 10 mL Rollerball
- 10 mL Organic Jojoba Wax)
Combine all essential oils and Jojoba wax into rollerball. Gently shake before each use. Apply to inner wrists, temples and heart area as often as needed.
Need some help with this? Fill out this short contact form and I’ll be happy to share more! Start investing in yourself today!